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Honeysett: Welcome to edition number 3, fellow craft beer hipster and typical kiwi living in Australia.. Filthridden! Kia Ora mate! How you finding living in Australia?
Filth: I am loving it. Realised it was my home after only a few weeks of living in Melbourne and have never looked back. Loads of good beers, places to eat and met some good people. Only issue has got to be that most people don't know the difference between Union and league which makes me twitch every time.... and that AFL rubbish!
Honeysett: That's good to hear mate, what's your favourite pub in melbs?
Filth: I've honestly been thinking about this for the last hour. Reckon I have over-analysed the question a bit. Favourite pub in Melbs would probably be the Alehouse Project up in Brunswick. Good selection of craft beers updated regularly and nice wee spot with a good beer garden out the back. If you had asked me about bars, venues, brewpubs, wineries, breweries etc around, I could write a thesis on where to go in VIC.
Honeysett: Haha well that's good to hear mate. At least you're experiencing Melbourne. My favourite is Beer DeLuxe I had a pint of craft a burger and chips for $12 and a headjob from a delightful brunette waitress. Tell us about little filth, where'd you grow up and how'd you go as a teen. I'm picturing a lot of Police Ten Seven.
Filth: Haha that always helps. Arbory and Young and Jackson are my go-tos down that way but people do seem to love Beer DeLuxe. young filth grew up on the notorious North Shore of New Zealand's beautiful Auckland. He was was a great student getting top grades until he hit about 17 and discovered alcohol and women and that he really didn't care for school all that much all of a sudden. Had my fair share of run ins with (and runs from) the police but mostly we were on the right side of the law or it was a simple misunderstanding. My view has always been that cops are people. Some cops are arseholes and some are bloody great, just like any other group of people.
Honeysett: Simple misunderstanding like breaking into the wrong house? Haha. What's the thing you miss most about NZ?
Filth: Simple misunderstandings including cops threatening to break our knees to get us to confess to smashing up a bus shelter (which we didn't). Unfortunately that one went all the way to court but the charges got dropped and one of the cops lost his job. What do I miss most about NZ? Probably growing up so close to the beach and seeing my family and friends from back home. That and cheap, abundant feijoas... oh and alcohol prices. Fuck Australian alcohol prices.
*Honeysett Googles what a feijoas is and nods politely*
Honeysett: Yeah fair enough mate, I'm surprised as a hipster you're not riding around on a scooter run by the smugness of your own thoughts. Anyway.. We did the thing you miss the most. What's the thing you miss the least?
Filth: Is smugness an environmentally friendly fuel source? I keep telling myself I'm not a hipster but I do play a sport that people don't even know is a sport and have a random diet that no one has heard of, a beard and I live in Northcote so I am pretty much nailing the hipster category. The thing I miss the least? Auckland weather. In Melbourne, you get all your rain in a couple of days every now and then. Proper storms whereas in Auckland it kinda drizzles for like five or six days straight or its humid or its just shitty weather and then when it is sunny you get burnt to a crisp in about 20mins. Don't miss that, don't miss the lower wages and don't miss the poor excuse for public transport. Don't miss trying to pick up kiwi women either! Haha.
Honeysett: Trying to pick up kiwi women? Most of the kiwi girls I know want to be trucks when they go up. You can't mention the sport you play that no knows and then not enlighten us...
Filth: Ultimate Frisbee. Decided to give it a shot as a mate played and I needed to meet some Melbourne friends. That night I learnt no one parties like ultimate players. Got invited to a house party and didn't leave til 530am, avoiding a final tequila shot as I bailed out the door. The guy whose house it was in now one of my best mates over here. Really good people.
Honeysett: Haha fuck yeah man nice. You mentioned you dropped the grades to chase the girls, like the other two lads before you, same question. How'd you pop your cherry?
Filth: No great story here, unfortunately - lost it to a girlfriend some years ago. Although it was in my brother's house and I had to steal some condoms from him haha. Wonder if he ever knew. My numbers haven't never been high, my friend who came out in his mid-twenties probably shagged three times as many women as I ever did but he's now married to the love of his life and I found the woman for me in Melbourne who is from your neck of the woods, old WA! I don't mention this on the forum as I know the rule about mentioning your other half and I assume that doesn't count in this interview. SI has seen her on facebook and says he feels he knows her intimately after the number of times he's spent late nights looking at her photos for 10-15mins at a time.
Honeysett: Hahaha brilliant mate! Glad to hear you've settled down, hopefully I don't know her. That would be awkward for us both. You're a Warriors tragic, describe how that feels every year mate
Filth: Surely she'd never admit if she knew you because that would be embarrasing. Anyway, yeah... Warriors... I can't imagine there's a team in the NRL that is as much of an emotional rollercoaster. Most pre-seasons you get the idea that this could finally be our year. Usually game one brings you crashing right down to reality in the grim realisation that although things have changed, nothing has changed. Same shit different year. In saying that, it's worth the highs. Being in a pub in the Auckland viaduct crammed full of people and seeing Johnson put Lewi Brown over in the corner to put us into the 2011 Grand Final was the definite peak for me. Watching Johnson when he's on form is simply unparalleled. Some don't know this but I was a Dragons fan before the Warriors came along but couldn't refuse the temptation of going to live rugby league a dozen times each year and backing a team full of kiwis and although I'll always have a soft spot for St George, I could never go back.
Honeysett: Yeah I don't blame her haha. It sounds just as tragic as I imagined it. Fill us in on your most embarrassing moment
Filth: So you gotta understand that when I was a teenager/early 20s I was a pretty shy, quiet and private kid. Went to my best mates older sisters flatwarming where it was all her friends plus about six or seven from our group plus his parents. Night goes on, we've all had a few drinks and I've heard his Dad likes to do a bit of palm reading after a few beers so I rock up and ask him to give it his best shot. 5mins later half the party is crowded around watching and listening. Suddenly, his exact words "it says here that you're hung like a horse and you shag like a shagging machine." From the back of the room I hear my ex tell "I can vouch for that!" Quiet, shy little filth wanted the ground to open up and swallow him at that stage. While party was pissing themselves laughing. Thankfully I don't really have any shame anymore so don't have any recent embarrassing stories, although there was this one time with an airport security guy last year... but that's a story for another time.
Honeysett: Sounds like a humble brag to me hahaha. How did you come up with the filthridden name
Filth: I used to play a lot of first person shooters online in my teenage years, thought I was a bit of a funny cunt always using names of celebrities like Nelson Mandela, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Audrey Hepburn, Queen Elizabeth II etc. when I wasn't doing that, I had two names that I kept coming back to for no real reason. I ended up sticking with filthridden and it's great because no one ever seems to use that when I sign up to anything. Filthridden was the far less childish of the two options as well and I'm glad I'm not known as Tittieburgers.
Honeysett: You realise we can change your name? Ole tittieburgers could make a comeback. Same question every time, who's your favourite poster on this forum?
Tittieburgers: That's always a tough one, like the bars in Melbourne I could probably name three dozen for different reasons. SI probably and Milchy with an honourable mention. You're not far behind either mate even if you are a dirty blue supporting grub. Everyone brings something different whether it's knowledge of the game, of fantasy, it's history, humour or just keeping this awesome community going. This place thrives on diversity. Fav poster from Sportal days was none other than Jack Bauer himself and I've been lucky enough to become good friends with him since moving here. I love the fact that he's nothing like what I expected. He could totally be a secret agent - he travels a lot for work and has records at his local gym for various things. It's all coming together! Secrets out, JACK!
Honeysett: Hahaha what a mystery that man was. Absolute lad. Pick a superpower, why and would you end up good or evil?
Tittieburgers: Being able to teleport myself and others. Could go skiing in Canada or sunbathing in Hawaii anytime I wanted to. No more 13hr flights sitting next to fat bogans on Jetstar. Good? Evil? Maybe both. Good because I'd be sharing it with my friends and evil because I'd probably be robbing banks n' shit rather than working my 40hr week hahaha. Could also teleport into Warriors HQ and slap Ken Maumalo. He would never catch me. Not that he ever catches anything.
Honeysett: Haha excellent! I'm glad you think that about Maumalo, most of my mates are kiwis and think he's a good player. I don't see it. You're out of the piss and can take 3 famous people with you. Alive or dead who do you take
Tittieburgers: He's capable and he's got heart it just looks like they're trying to coach him into being the next Vatuvei which he isn't and never will be. Fus is far superior! 3 alive or dead... hmmm... Two of my close friends passed away in the past couple of years so I would say them plus my missus. Would be great to see them again and hang out plus I reckon the three of them would've gotten along like crazy. I would be the first to call it a night And they'd all continue on til dawn, I would guarantee it.
Honeysett: I had you pegged as a lightweight. Confirmation. Alright we'll finish with one final question. What's your words to live by?
Tittieburgers: Haha I've dropped off since hitting my 30s I reckon, if I'm on form you gotta watch me though. Words to live by... I've got a favourite poem that has always been an inspiration to me when I've needed it: "The Invitation" by Oriah Mountain Dreamer. Worth a read. My own words: Be happy for yourself. Understand who you are and what you need to be happy and just do it. Don't worry about what other people think too much and don't worry about who or what society wants you to be. Be happy the way you want to be happy.
Honeysett: Some great words to live by there mate. Thanks for joining me mate. Catch up for a crafty in Melbz soon, I'll bring the Kale.
Tittieburgers: Cheers, HS. Single origin kale only plz
Honeysett: Goes without saying.
